does one really give and take?

i had a run in with a pal i had known for over 10 years just now. Originally, steven had wanted to meet for buffet this thurs and i decided that since all 4 of us can meet up, I suggested that we should try some expensive buffet instead, and hence, suggested the ritz.

i dunno how many of you had done it before, but when u are the planner, you would usually ask a few folks and ideally, the best scenerio is all will eventually get to meet up, but sometimes things often do not go as planned and some folk(s) will not be able to make it. If your group is large, then maybe that one person will not make a diff. but when its just a small gp of less then 5, then ideally u would prefer to re arrange the whole thing so that all can make it on another more appropriate timing. How many times as a planner that you had to go through with this crap about having to fit in all together? I mean, you are merely the planner right? You are not their individual PA for christ's sake, so how the hell can you go about trying to know all's schedules so that u can suggest a suitable time? The thing is, there is simply no such thing as a suitable time; either way, sacrifices will have to be made.

Especially for a small group, when one person do not show up, there often exist a domino effect on the rest of the folks, and they will either tell you to re-arrange, or if they are really great pals, they will just meet up despite a small group size. But then again, the activity one do also has its effects on it; a movie can occir despit only having 2 pals, but when its a meal, often than not, food is secondary and chatting is priority.

So, anyway, we all managed to get a place we wanted to go but somehow, timing conflicts caused me to suggest that we should go another time. My friend told us to go ahead wothout her but like i said, when she dropped out, there may be domino effects amongs the remaining 3 on the buffet deal. You can stop here and go on and say that that is so not true but just pause and think about it: how many times do u not feel like meeting up cos one party dropped out? You can say its not often, but still chances are, you would had experienced it.

So, i said "aiya...i think we go another time lah, i managed to get a fren to go with me this sat...hahaha" followed by " planning with you all very troublesome...hahaha"

my pal whom dropped out then went mad saying that why do i need to cancel this because i still have 2 other ppl going with me to the buffet. I am too lazy to type so just copied and pasted...

Gal pal:
you ask A friend to go along
if you ask Qiyou and Steven then ok liao lah

Guy Pal A:
u dumn sucker eh

Gal Pal:
then i already mention i withdraw mah

Guy Pal:
we already say ok

I say:
do u both mind my fren??

Guy Pal:
then now u say such crap
u go both la?
lol

I said:
i just think that is like rocket science everytime we wanna do something lor...so many diff agendas

Guy Pal:
WE ARE OK...
u never hear what Gal Pal says?

Gal PAl:
I withdraw

I say:
then want this to go then that one go...it can get very tiring u noe...

Guy PAl:
hah..its simple mixing of sugar in tea
haha
me and steven ok..the end
jos will join us next time?

Gal Pal:
ya

I say:
i ask more ppl to go k, so if you want just tell me k...haha
its just calling to add more space anyway

Gal PAl:
see see
now you want to ask more

I say:
cos my fren asking her frens too

Gal Pal:
ask 3 already complain we mafan
then ask more

I say:
but at least they are efficient...

Gal Pal:
we 3 meet every time no problem oso
we oso wait for you wat
1 in army
1 was having attachment

Gal Pal:
i have work
then

Guy Pal:
read this..
tsktsk

I said:
like i said, mostly when we meet u all want everyone wat...
so if its not a group thing how whould i know if u wanna join me and my pals?

Gal Pal:
the thing is you ask this side
then you ask your friends
then your friends agree then you just tell us
its ok

I say:
cos we were planning to go fullerton...

Gal Pal:
go another time instead
i going with my friend
thats wat QY is talking abotu '
thats wat you just did

I say:
then since this side like one cannot make it (which i presume will cause all to meet the next time as a group) i told the other side that we go ritz instead lor

Gal PAl:
QY and Steven say OK
why you presume

I say:
then this side next time i'll suggest fullerton

Gal Pal:
have you tot of how they feel?

Guy PAl:
weve got a spokesperson..lol

I say:
maybe they wanted to meet as a group?
and since its only 3 i reckoned they will want to postpone and meet as a gp next time?

Gal Pal:
MAybe again

I say:
when we go and eat ain;t that the case?

Guy Pal:
we didnt say anything..
steven didnt say NO..neither did i
scroll up..haha

I say:
so, if its just three of us will u guys (okm maybe not steven cos he's fine with any) really want to go?
will you, kiyo, want to still pay 65 and go for buffet with me and steven if its just 3 of us?

Guy PAl:
did i say no?
haha

I say:
u can say u dun mind and stuffs like that but i think you would rather go as a gp rite?

Gal Pal:
Dun assume agaun
again

Guy Pal:
i already said im fine to go dinna on thurs
as in,..i told him

I say:
but was that on account that oits will be a group thing?

Guy Pal:
so..tts the final answer
i didnt mention anything about the grp thingy
i was jus askin whether they wana go

I say:
ultimately u go and buffet is to go in gp so there will be fun and talk and gossiping rite? so i was just say that we can postpone and go as a gp the next tim

Gal PAl:
even if there is no buffeet

Guy PAl:
just go la? jos says she can join us another time ma

Gal PAl:
steven and QY is going for steamboat

Guy:
further more..theres alot of buffets in aingapore
LOL

Gal:
and they ask you along
will they still go if you say you du want to go

I say:
for me, i know they will still go even if i dun go

Gal:
same lah
i dun go they still need to eat wat
like how they plan

I say:
but is that the case similar when u look at it from another side?

Gal:
so where did the grp thing come out
from you only
where got another side
Steamboat
change to Buffeet
then

Guy:
ok..chill
haha..

I say:
seriously, i can take no for an answer, there were instences i say i do not wanna do this and that u guys can go do it sans me...

Gal:
thats all mah

Gal:
dun need give in and put 9pm
yhou all will have nothing to eat
just go ahead
so now its only i not going mah
y you want cancel

I say:
like i said from the beginning: a buffet amongs us 4 will be a gp thing, so if someone backs out, why dun we just re arrange and go another time?
that is for the expansive buffet
steamboat buffet
anytime
i mean if u think about it, we are gonna sopenf 48 or 65 and if its just 3, it'll not be as fun, and chances are we will not go back again to the place...so might as well just re arrange

Gal:
you just want to win
then take it that everything you oso right lah

I say:
u can say whatever
but like i said, the buffet is a gp thing, why bother spending a bomb and have so mush unhappiness and then one party who did not go will just sulk and wonder how the food is

Gal:
Assumption again

I say:
thats what u like to say too

Gal:
10 years of friendship
you think i will sulk 1 side then fine lah

I say:
its precisely becouse its 10 years

Gal:
anything you say
lah

I say:
thats y everytime we meet we want to have a gp thing and be happy...so,m why leave someone out?
what;s the reason for us meeting up and eat./sing/mahjong
its to talk and update each other abouth life right?
so, if one party is missing, will it be as much fun?
i dun think theres any issue with postponing a buffet just cos someone cannot make it

Gal:
take it that i am out of the group
never time just ask another gal pal will do

i say:
i am not pointing the fault at you gal pal...i am just saying, that we will go another time

Guy Pal:
yeah lo..dun see things wrongly
we will go buffet next week

And then there came no reply from her side...